It’s Easter. It’s my birthday week. It was a full moon lunar eclipse.

I’m an Aries who usually starts announcing her birthday at least a month before it arrives. Not this year. I took myself to the beach. Solo. Batteries in serious need of recharging.

In January I had experimented with some foods that I’ve been avoiding for many years. A bit of honey here and there. Some 90% chocolate (read “10% sugar”). Yams. Even some … potatoes. Non-GMO corn chips.

I just kept thinking, “Damn it, I’ve been such a good girl for so long, surely I’ve healed enough to be able to tolerate a few more foods! I deserve this!”

It became evident in February that I was in an autoimmune and yeast flare. Fatigue, foggy head, body aches. And, fatigue. Really tired.

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This is an edited post from January 7^th, 2014. I’ve deepened my understanding of the Twelve Holy Days. May you find value in this exploration of an age-old spiritual tradition.

It’s winter for real, now. The light may be returning after Solstice, but for most of us the air is cold and it’s more comfortable indoors. Or maybe under the covers.

Today is Christmas. I’m not particularly Christian, but I find value in many symbols from many different spiritual traditions. Tomorrow begins the Twelve Holy Days.

Solstice, December 21st, marks the moment in the northern hemisphere when the day is shortest, the longest night. The tightest contraction, if you will. There’s a span of time where things stop. The days aren’t immediately longer. There’s a resting. When early Christians chose the 25th of December as the birthday of the Christ, they did so for a reason. This is when we begin to experience movement again, just the inkling of expansion. The Sun appears again.

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People sometimes ask me what kind of training I have to do the counseling work that I do. That question always makes me want to laugh and cry.

Yes, I have training in multiple spiritual, psychological and coaching modalities. Personal healing and spiritual awakening has been a central focus in my life since my late 20s. But, I didn’t embark on this path to heal others. I was crawling through the muck of my personal story, and was sick and tired of suffering.

It has not been a straight line, this healing path. There’s a saying that we travel in spirals as we heal, revisiting similar issues cyclically. Each time you find yourself seemingly going over the same ground, check in and see what’s shifted since the last time you were here. Are you catching the patterns faster? Do you have more awareness about the process you are in? Is there are part of you that is not quite as caught up in the story as it plays out? This is progress. We heal, sometimes slowly, and sometimes more quickly. But, movement is happening. Can you give yourself credit for that?

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My family attended a Beltane festival yesterday, an ancient Celtic celebration of springtime and fertility. We celebrated the outgoing May Queen (curtsy) and King, and welcomed a new May royalty who will hold and embody in sacred trust the ability of the earth and all its inhabitants to bring forth new life.

That may be literal or metaphoric children. We birth our ideas, we birth our creative endeavors, we birth our changes in our work-in-the-world. We all wrote down what we wanted to bring into life in the coming year on a ribbon and tied it to the Maypole – the sky god’s very own phallus resting in the earth mother’s yoni. We danced and sang and wrapped that phallus with our sincere wishes for prosperity and love and health and world peace. (In true Beltane fashion there were a few wishes expressed for really good sex, too.)
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I didn’t go into Lent with high spiritual ideals. It was a mindfulness exercise. But, perhaps unrelated, I’m more in touch with some mysterious thread, or, more appropriately, a thread of mystery. Was it uncovered because I’m more rested from consuming less caffeine and getting more sleep? Perhaps. It may be a combination of that and being hit by the hardest virus I’ve contracted in many years. Fever is harder on me than I remember it being in my youth. Being brought to my knees seems a particularly Lenten activity. The part of me that knows there are no accidents tunes into this.

I’m simplifying somewhat. This thread has actually been growing and strengthening for many years. It’s the core of my work. The core of my life. But, there’s a confidence in what is known that has reached a new threshold.

What is known is:

A wild woman herbalist in me who likes to sniff and boil and steep and sip.

A shaman dropping into liminal space and moving toxins out of this body system. I’ve seen Lyme literally dropping out of my body. A spirit teacher ripping a length of DNA that had developed from ancestral trauma and habit, and knit my building blocks back together without them.
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It’s winter for real, now. The light may be returning after Solstice, but for most of us the air is cold and it’s more comfortable indoors. Or maybe under the covers.

Sunday marked the twelfth day of the Twelve Holy Days. I’m not particularly Christian, I find value in many symbols from many different spiritual traditions. And this year, the Twelve Holy Days felt very significant to me.

Solstice, December 21st, marks the moment in the northern hemisphere when the day is shortest, the longest night. The tightest contraction, if you will. There’s a span of time where things stop. The days aren’t immediately longer. There’s a resting. When early Christians chose the 25th of December as the birth day of the Christ, they did so for a reason. This is when we begin to experience movement again, just the inkling of expansion. The Sun appears again.

Those first 12 days of expansion are a time when we can experience the coming energy of the year. What will come into our lives? What intentions will we set? The 12 Holy Days are a time when God or the Universe or the Holy Spirit or your Higher Power, whatever words resonate for you, can be heard in the quiet. Some traditions say the 12th day, January 6th, is when the Magi visited the baby Jesus. When the Sun became known to the conscious mind.

Whether you know it as such or not, this is where your authentic New Year’s Intentions come from – your Highest Self speaking to you about your next steps in life.
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